LamBAtells: 100Truths

Seen this like 5-7months back but was just pfffttt about it...decided to do it today.

1. Last drink: water

2. Last phone call:   Tiwa Savage'sPR

3. Last text message: the father

4. Last song you listened to: Mr Eazi - Bankulize

5. Last time you cried:  last year? I think

SIX HAVE YOU EVER:

6. . Dated someone twice: No

7. Been cheated on: Yes

8. Kissed someone:

LamBAtells: In Love Again

#np Mr Eazi x Klu - Ohemaa

I set out to be an 'ashewo' around May last year after some matters of the heart (see here). Aspiring Ashewo I called myself, as I was learning the trade.
Now don't get me wrong about the 'ashewo' work here...there are two types of ashewo: ashewo wey dey collect money for services rendered and ashewo wey just dey on a nacking spree.
I was aiming for the latter.
Now I didn't have all the essential tools needed: extra throway cash, a fast car, a fixed tab at some bar etc but I did have some other essentials like: my face, worked at a bank that year and a BB.
:D
Bingo! Finish! I mean I am in my sexual prime so now is the time.
As I was basically learning on my own I quickly realized that the BB and face were rather important. So I started to hawk myself...I would encourage female friends to go on and put on my picture as their dp(massive shouts to instagram), with a status that read 'For sale'. It works
Twitter is a great place too! Oh twitter.
Pins came in, chats started, some got deleted, weekends came, people came(pun intended)
Business was booming!! I mean I was amazed at what I had accomplished by November. Put in two older ladies in your calculations.
On one of my escapades, I learnt never leave your phone with a 'client'. It could be disastrous. One girl I was with had taken my phone and had taken a picture of us and used it as my dp. I didn't discover until about 2hours later.
ADVICE: if you are out there and you are an aspiring ashewo, I'll give you an assignment that would go a long way in your career. Do you know the difference between a panty liner and sanitary pad? Stop jonzjng o
ASHEWO NO BE WORK, NA LIFESTYLE

NYNEEEEE:ONE DAY

People just dey come, and when the time comes na one day we meet o/na one day we meet o/ once upon a time you realise, one day we meet o/ one day we.....
People just dey come, people just dey go, when the time comes you will really never know, na the one day we meet o x2
Once upon a time when u were still here, didn't realise one day u would be over there, na till the one day we meet o

  ' .....how can life be so cruel, you were only 22, a friend and sister..... We gon miss you Ini and you be living in the sky.......Oya sun re omo, till we meet again, we dey here we dey mourn...'

- Lucc

I am still in awe, would probably always be...shit is too surreal
The words are from SDC, a song they did for their friend Adeola 'Kobain' Randolph....its laden with emotions and it describes what the friends must feel and part of what i feel. Tweaked it up a bit to my feelings.
We miss you Ini, memories and pictures are all we have and nothing can take that away from us.
#LordKnows 

DOWNLOAD: SDC -ONE DAY 

LamBAtells:HOW I FEEL

Culled from GIM cause this is how a brother feels. In my case, two girls. 

I find now that rather than write something vulgar or humorous, I tend not to be able to write unless the subject matter is one which affects me directly.... or to be disgustingly honest, emotionally.
This morning, it suddenly occurred to me that I've just reached the end of a particular sequence all of us have gone through before (and still will go through). This one will shock those who know me...
There are 4 stages in a break-up. I hereby classify them as Anger, Despair, Loneliness and Recognition. Let me explain....
Yes, there was a girl. Yes, I am capable of feeling for something other than myself. Yes, this is Womilee. No, I'm not on my period. I was simply put in a position I'm not accustomed to. Cut the long story short, I was her rebound guy, and I didn't realize it till it was over. Now that the sob story is done, the tissues have stopped being passed around, I'd like to enlighten you all on the stages which I mentioned. This way, next time your heart gets used as a shoe rag, at least you'll know what the fuck exactly you're going through.

C.E.O Dagrin!!!!!!

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Happy birthday bro....REST IN PERFECTION

NOWplayIN:CHYKAY ft FALZ - LIES

Chykay, son of the 80's crooner HARRY MOSCOW hits us hard with this song that features Falz. Its a freestyle of sorts seeing that he went in on Jamie Foxx's Fall for your type beat.Tunnnneeeee tho...and by the way,CHYKAY IS THE FUTURE OF NIGERIAN RnB!!!
#enjoy

DOWNLOAD Lies

LamBAtells:SHE GONE

Remember Ojezmina (lambatells-rewind-ojezmina). and special-dedicasong-for-ojezmina

Well, I lost her.

LamBAtells:P.S i Love You

#np Akon - Right now(na, na, na)

Hey Mo,
First of I am sorry for promises not kept, wish I could fulfill them somehow starting with posting that letter.
I'm sorry for the times I acted like it didn’t matter/I didn’t care, icareverymuch, icarestill.
Thank you for being you, my cheerleader, my therapist, my lover, my ‘Gonzo queen’ (LoL).
Thank you for believing so so much in me and always urging me on regardless.
Guess u didn’t know that Mo in Mo’ Fizz was you
Thank you for everything you have done for me, EVERYTHING! Starting from that bible to the food and locks.
imissus

In other thots FUCK I.T,
Wish you had a lil more trust in me
Wish I wasn’t so conceited at times
Wondering what would have been
Shouts to your friends, I don’t like them anymore I would still say hello
And don’t ever for one day start to think that you are like a sister to me cos if we end up alone in a room, there are still 20,000 things I might do to you.
Hopefully, I get to be as funny as before to some other girl
And if eventually after July we stop talking
P.S iloveyoustill

imissdgirlifellinlovewitin2008 

                  

hafiz

BALLER BUKS:THE PAIN IS STILL HERE

#np Share my blessings – Naeto C ft Asa

The pain is still here....I remember u and that part of me is empty and I just wonder what would have been if u were still here...
My messenger used to be the first thing I signed in...but I barely even remember to sign the yahoo now....prolly cos I know u won’t be there ever again......I miss u
I would always remember the last time I saw u...wish I knew that was the last time I would see u
Wish I had spoken more, played more, taken pictures
Wish I had come out that night u asked me to come out....
Now all I have are memoires ….good memories

I miss u Buks
KISMET

#np Coming Home – Diddy Dirty Money

theLamBA movement

Shouts to everybody that has been there since day 1 of thelamba movement(2008) @doublewealth, @leke90, @imoy20, @stuarthaydin , @tofa07, @padelamba in that tiny room to the penthouse @peprolamba, @idamjr, @babaako, @balopee .Shouts to the promoters too @absayo.
Been over two years of music sharing/artist promotions, been a year of blogging,been eight months of music blogging, from here on to bigger things
Shouts to @labzylawal, the first artist to get his music on thelamba. Small movement now, big dreams though.
Shouts to @tecknicoleurGrl, u were there from the first post
Yo! If you have ever checked this blog by real or by mistake, shouts to you too. All the beautiful girls that followed....I know all of you.
Awon ti UK,i sees you gan
Awon ti Yankee,i felt you o
Awon ti Naija,i saw u too
Awon ti blackberry,i seen you
Awon ti PC,i sawd you
Big big shout to all the interim first ladies @bimsalimee, @ikeiyiola ,@desolaaa, @jolielopez we will pick one day....love you guyz

And if you don’t understand theLamBA movement, am getting you
You will one day...

LamBAtells:MY SISTER/MY LOVER/MY FRIEND

                                                          

I had known your name months before meeting you….we shared friends in common or I had friends that liked you, as a matter of fact I had even heard you speak before #shouts to Kay P for that one
So we went to the same school, and I met you officially in October of 2006…we hit it off…became best pals, you would keep seat for me no matter how long it took for me to come to class…people even started to model them own relationship to look like ours, forming friends but they never lasted cos they didn’t know the history we shared…..
Remember writing you some fin in year 2….can’t find the original draft but remember some tins I put in there….and I remember that u used to have that note in ur purse….so here’s the tins I remember disjointedly

‘……….call me that your water just broke and your bout to hit delivery…I know it’s far off but call me

….whenever you need me, call me and il be there in a hurry….Remember GEC 212…offer still stands….il run to you

…mmmmhhh some tin about you bin naked and me not closing my eyes…lol…..ur fam naa

…some tin bout anybody messing with you and me calling the ‘Goons’…we’ve increased now…so please call us if anybody tampers with you….

………………………………………………………………….’

….cant remember it all….il look for that draft….i keep all this tins….I even still have notes that you wrote to me in year 2….didn’t mean to keep that one sha…
So, five years and still mad at it (stilmatic)…tho, our buildings have put a bit of a barrier btw us….we stil good abi…
I know you have spoilt alotta runs for me….all those girls that thought me and you was a couple and wont trespass but iwuvustill….e dey pain me
You made start to talk…never used to talk to anybody like dat
Yo! Every promise I might have made to you still stands….#dontdull exploit me
Lil sister I never had….IWUVUMUCH and I miss u
And you are gna be gone this year…..i don’t Skype o


P.S if we are not married by 40,lets promise to marry our selves….lol….sounds corny abi…heard it in some movie one year lik dat….for green card sha

WUVUSTILL

LamBAtells: An OPEN LeTTeR to YOU

Hey u,
Few minutes ago,ME was just chilling…the stretched legs, hands interlaced behind ME neck kind of chilling…then just like dat; u pop up in the picture and am like “why”?...a brawl takes place in my head…I try stopping the thought of U,…not becos of anything negative but my fear of the positives involved..I cant help but not to think about the shape of your eyes and your nose, the way you stare as if you see right through to ME……your ears ;u say they aren’t beautiful & I don’t blame u not knowing how imperfect the ears of others are….things like your silly little laugh or the way you smile …..u know what....looking back at the year 2010, the zenith of that year was d day WE met..#believethat………and for the records this dude here is still gonna be in luv witchu for a very longtym….....*now shouting* 'u knw u is my sweerie'....

Yours sincerely
.
You know who.

LamBAtells: JOSELOSIL

Hey u,

I just moved and I am going through my old stuffs and I found my sim card from four years ago/chemistry note.
In the sim card, I had messages from you as far back as our first convo….
In the chemistry note, I found three notes/letter you had written to me, all these prompted me to remember.

I REMEMBER:

I remember the first day I saw you, I was new to the school, I loved your legs, it would be one year before we spoke to each other.
You calling your bro and asking to talk to me, I was in shock and in awe.
You sending a junior girl to say hey to me after Sunday service.
I remember my first message to you.
Watching you run during the interhouse sport heats, I noticed your waist beads.

Your note that you scribbled all sorts on the cover
I remember the cheek rubs, when my beards just started sprouting.
Our first convo, and how we discovered that we were into each other, I still have the text msgs.

I remember telling your bro that I liked you and in his words “if u get game, nothing do u” …
Our first kiss, still on my top five list….lol…..really
You giving me your rosary, I still have it….its cut though
I remember getting to my locker one day and found that you had arranged it and written in my chemistry note.
I remember you hugging me and crying cos you were gonna miss me, makes me smile till today.
I remember I was your baby belle, and you my baby beau.
The respect you taught me and had for me.

My own Posh spice

I remember UT4shizzle

stillmatic

LamBAtells:FUNMIOGUNJA

#np High mi – Eddie

So am thinking about her…how fine and light skinned she is and how I would like to know her than I already do, I don’t know anything actually expect that her name is Funmi. She’s my mom’s name sake

Lemme see what I tink I know:
I know she loves that naija music ….ilike
I know she light skinned              ….ilike
She would be fun to be with(extremely good company), she says she likes music, food, fashion, graphic design, alcohol etc the same things I crave for….lol
So:

“My dream girl, she’s beautiful, sexy, curvy, intelligent,

She loves me, I love her,

But, if I cant have funmi,

Then I pretend,

Am kneeling,

She’s sitting,

I propose,

She laughs,

She jumps on me and says yes,

Am smiling, am happy,

But am just daydreaming,
If I can’t have funmi”

SpecialDedicasong #np Marry me - Chykay

SPECIAL DEDICASONG FOR: ojezmina

Cc: REWIND OJEZMINA

DOWNLOAD Chykay - Haba

LamBAtells:You in ONE word - "IMMACULATE".

...as a child, you come across words that simply put you off balance, either by the way they sounded when pronounced or by their meanings, which you believe are probably unattainable or totally unrealistic...I've come across different words...by reason of my DAD...in all...one word has always stood out by reason of its meaning...the word "IMMACULATE"...now this word should actually be scrapped but reason of its deep meaning and near impossibility or so i thought...then she happened...

Waz makin final corrections to my project...then here comes my sweerie (my friend's sis) 7 a friend...by default yours truly isn't the "let-me-meet-your-friend" dude...7 of-course this wasnt different...then #GBAM...I make that absolutely wonderful but simply unforgettable mistake...through her frames...her eyes, the color of storm clouds above the ocean I involuntarily drowned in them...did she notice...I really doubt that...but someone did...of-course me started tellin me right there and then "ol'boy you hooked" ...now dayz after...yours truly and the FAM (talkin LamBA) with all the configuration of a true LamBAnian...then i feel poke by me side...I turn...its me sweerie...we hug...we talk...then laugh over a couple of things I bet I dont still have an idea of (apologies to my sweerie)...my mouth waz-laughin...my brain waz-whereis SHE?...my eyes were-searchin...uh huh...I see her...I pretend not to be sure if she is actually the one...I ask my sweerie...& she gives me the look of "yeah, & so wat, why am I askin"...now am walkin up to her not havin the slightest idea of what am gonna say...then am like "its me we are talkin about, init, I got this"...am in front of her now...and am like "HI"...then I hear a "HELLO" that waz truly melodious...although in my head, yours truly heard this - "hello, thanks for coming over, I've always been looking forward to this...could we chat for awhile" ...this prompted my crazy reply - "am actually fagged out right about now, but probably I'll check on you one of these dayz"...then she that thing with her eyes...& am like..........

BALLER BUKS:KISMET

I am sad still
I think about you still
I read our messages to each other every time
I remember
How u opened a windows messenger acct for me using your name as my password so we cud video call cos yahoo was fucking up
Our late/overnight talks
The songs I asked you to download
How surprised I was that you knew the wordings to the song “Eji – Owuro” and that you promised to sing it to me when u saw me
Never was to be.
How thru d video calls I got to see u more and even met Troy
The talks we had while you typed your essays
I miss your voice
Now every British program reminds me of you
I miss u calling me ‘Bobo yi’ whenever I was a lot hilarious
I haven’t cried, I can’t cry cos am still in shock
I still try your number with wished hope that you would pick up but it won’t happen
I still go online and wish to see Bukola online but not
I will never forget the last time I saw you
Wished I had played more with you
Wish I didn’t get angry with you
Wish I had spoken to you more
Wish I had called you on your birthday
Wish ii had said I was sorry when u said you were not happy with me
Wish I had sent more than the meaning of kismet to you the last time I texted you
I miss my digital girl
And I am sad still
Sleep well Buks

KISMET

BALLER BUKS:HUNGOVER

So i had this mad hangover two days back with the usual headaches and all. While i was in my sorry state,i got thinking and i remembered that the last time i had an hangover,i was with Baller Buks..

June 26th;10:00am
My fone vibrates bringing me out of my temporary coma,my voice husky as hell,Bukky says for me to tell her about my whereabouts so we can meet up later,says she's with shade.
So i gets ready cos this is the second first time i would be seeing her.

1:00/2:00pm
Shade calls me to meet them at Alago Meji.I hop on a bike and i get there decked in my white blink 'N V ME' tee. i get in the car and i sees her,she is wearing this purple dress and looking good.We went to Elegushi beach where shade's fam was opening his paint balling center.She told me she wanted to wear her bikini but her uncles wouldnt let her....lol
Later we go to the palms mall,ate and bought ice cream.I ate all of hers and she was a bit peeved at me

8:00pm
On our way home,we are both sitting at the back of the car and have a bit of time to ourselves. we talked/laffed/snuggled......
They dropped me off at Harvey road junction and I get on a bike and a text comes in from her,it says 'PERFECT'.
That was to be the last time I would ever see her.

imissustil buks

BALLER BUKS:ONMYMINDSTIL

I met u one year ago one week from now....
we was at the twins' birthday party and i had stood up to chase errbody inside to have a dance....
and i went towards u speaking yoruba cos i tot u wudnt understand...
and u laffed cos u understood...syrus caught it on camera
u went in nd started to dance....
but i was out of mood nd wudnt dance with nobody......
i remember moving away from the fan so u stay beside it and stop sweating....

I was minutes away from leaving and i tot wat d hell,talk to her....
we got talking...
i kept askin u to repeat urself cos i barely heard u well cos of ur accent.....
we talked for about 30 minutes and i said i was leaving....
and u asked for my number.....
i cudnt get yours cos my phone was off but i got ur facebook name tho....
'Baller Buks'...


I put my fone on the next morning and i got a text from you....
it sed 'r u home yet'....
i called the number back and it was you...



Its bin three weeks since you've bin gone and i missustil/tink bout u still
I still feel like you are gonna call me any time soon....but it wont happen

Sleep well my digital girl

Perveted Thots....mused by her

Kisses to your face,kisses to your scar/
Kisses to your neck,baby say ahh/
Kisses to your shoulder,kisses to your chest/
I lean back watch u smile,while i unbutton your shirt/
Then i pause and wait and have you thinking tee-Y whats next/
I suck on ur lips,while i explore your wetness/kisses to your nips,babe i love ur breast/kisses to ur thighs,kisses to your legs/
kisses to your tummy,all the way to your cleft/
its all bout u,its not bout sex...*laugh*...food therapy,put on u some ketchup/
or ice cream,wateva u up for/panties on the floor/
back to the door/baby say u want more/and me I'm already hard...rock...*chuckle*....

I'm not writing any more cos this tin be over when we both cum.....or when the song is over......LOL.... :-)